My friends and my blog keep me from cussing people out on the regular. This whole idea of saying you want something while creating thousands of obstacles to get in your way of those things, is totally unfathomable to me. It means that your actions are at complete odds with your words which happens sometimes. But then to be totally unaware of the fact that you're constantly at odds with your words is beyond me...
Perhaps this is totally real or I may just be an ambivalence trigger for some folks. I must admit, I've had that experience and that may have something to do with it. But I also see it in the world...a lack of passion for anything other than the grind. Perhaps because the grind has become so difficult and it's so much easier to have virtual lives and virtual relationships with people because life has so worn you out, that the idea of engaging other human beings is just too much to bear...
I call it ambivalence...perhaps a lack of passion for anything involving your heart or connecting to other human beings deeply is what's on the table here...not sure....
(stay tuned as i figure this shit out)