March 05th, 2015

i have experienced great, deep, beautiful pure love in my life.  and i didn't have to do a single thing to earn it...it just came...and I am ever-grateful because I am better for it...knowing that that depth of feeling and commitment exists in the world helps me move with surety...

as a result I'm clear that only great love can exist in my world.   it's curious and totally annoying how panicked that makes people... how many people are quick to suggest i settle for less because at this point, all that exists is less...and I've spent a lifetime becoming more...

i'm good, actually...quite good with what i have...and have no energy, nor inclination to open doors to less with the hopes that it may grow into more as long as i twist and bend myself in all different shapes to make that happen...

that's not love, that's loneliness and the commitment to becoming less than what I was meant to be...all for the sake of being with someone who needs me to be less to feel safe with me...

---