Self-Care as Resistance Part 5

Sacred Intimacy by Jade Beal Photography

I learned I didn't want to be obligated to anyone for anything.  I wanted to read for hours at a time and drink as much Cuban coffee as possible.  I wanted to have rhumba dance marathons at 3am until I dropped to my bed.  I wanted to wake up at 5am to a South African sunrise and sip coffee with my lover.  I wanted to own Moroccan rugs and Berber jewelry and only wear clothes that felt like pajamas.    And most importantly, these were things I was good at.  Acknowledging my desires and then pursuing them without the guilt of worrying about what's not taken care of (like laundry or taxes) allowed me to heal, to build self-esteem as I began doing what I was good at and what gave me joy.  

Focusing inward taught me that I'm built to dance in the first rain of summer.  Everything else is irrelevant and that's more than okay.  That's the gift that keeps giving...

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